How to Master the Art of Mindful Masturbation

Once you try mindful masturbation, you won't look back.

What is mindfulness?

We’ve surely all heard of mindfulness by now. But for those who don't know, it's the ability to be fully present at the moment and aware of the sensations in the body. Mindfulness is a grounding practice of observation. The trickiest part is noticing when your mind has drifted off and then bringing yourself back to what's happening in the current moment rather than ruminating on the past or worrying about the future.

Placing your attention in the present moment is certainly easier said than done in today's fast-paced world, but the reward is well worth the effort.

What is mindful masturbation?

You might be thinking, this is all well and good but what does mindfulness have to do with masturbation?

Well, have you ever been trying to get into a solo session only to have random thoughts of ‘need to add that onto the shopping list’ or ‘did I send that email?’. Mindful masturbation offers to ground you in the moment, getting you out of your head so you can explore pleasure and your body more sensually. 

Much like everyday practices of mindfulness, mindful masturbation entails paying close attention and engaging the senses fully. Sight, smell, touch, hearing and taste are all key to arousal.

For anyone that wants to broaden their sexual horizons, mindful masturbation is a great place to start. 

Do you find yourself slipping into masturbating the same way every time? For some, masturbating can become a routine that simply gets you from A to B. It can become formulaic, deepening our habits of arousal so that we are wired to reach orgasm in a specific rigid way - the way we’re ‘used to’. 

Sure we all have a few tricks up our sleeve that seem to do the job or a few go-to toys that we've become very… ahem attached to. And this is totally fine but if you want a little more from your sex life then consider mindful masturbation. 

It's been proven that habituation lessens the intensity of orgasms so if nothing else, giving yourself permission to explore, get curious and become more in tune, by practising mindful masturbation, will likely make your orgasms stronger.

And the benefits don't stop there.

Mindful masturbation allows you to learn new ways to make yourself feel good - important information which can be carried into your partnered sex life too. You can never know enough about your turn-ons and knowing the exact spots to tickle will make your communication with partners all the better. 

Mindful masturbation also:

• Improves sleep
• Helps boost self-esteem
• Releases stress
• Deepens pleasure and nurtures desire 
• Helps you tap into the subtleties and intricacies of pleasure and your body.
• Increases sexual confidence 

Ultimately, mindful masturbation offers to help keep you present, heighten your pleasure and broaden your sexual horizons where you might have believed there to be limits. Allowing a deeper connection with yourself and gaining a better understanding of your body and your preferences will lead to heightened pleasure. 

What's not to love?

1. Set an intention

Okay so that might sound a bit cheesy but it's actually quite an important step, especially for those of you who experience racing thoughts or an overly busy mind. 

Frame your session with some intent.

It doesn't matter what it is but consider what you want to get out of that particular solo session. 

Do you want to try getting off in a new position? Maybe standing up rather than sitting down or laying on your front rather than on your back. Play with temperatures, textures, or perhaps a new toy. Is there a particular scenario or fantasy you want to indulge in? 

Keeping this intention in mind whilst you're on your journey will help you stay present and focused on pleasure, reminding you that there's no rush to get to the finish line and reducing distractions. 

2. Set the scene 

Many of us have little rituals we carry out as part of our solo play that help us to feel more relaxed and sink into pleasure. Whether it's low-lit moody lighting, scented candles burning or having our favourite lube to hand. You know the drill, do what works for you!

3. Be aware of your breathing

The next step is vital. Breath is a signal to the rest of the body about our state of mind. Think about how much our breathing changes when we’re stressed or panicking. Slow deep breaths will have a calming effect. 

Deep breaths can also stimulate blood flow, helping with arousal. Taking a few deep breaths, closing your eyes and grounding yourself is great for anchoring yourself in the present moment.

4. Observe your thoughts

For those with a busy mind and constant inner monologue, mindfulness presents a challenge. The idea of quieting the mind for even long enough to knock one out can be tricky. But remember, mindfulness is not so much about making the thoughts that enter your mind go away but rather observing them, not getting caught up and seeing them as mental events that come and go.

One mindfulness hack to help you focus on breathing is to first accept that your mind will wander, this is totally normal. When you find yourself thinking about something that's distracting you from your pleasure, turn back to your breathwork. Picture the breath flowing in through your nose and following a path flowing right through you. Many people find the visual of this helps them to concentrate on breathing. 

5. Get curious about your body 

This has to be the best bit.

We're talking about exploring the wonders of the human body. We're lucky enough to have nerve endings dotted all over our bodies which makes discovering your most sensitive erogenous zones an absolute treasure hunt.

Start off exploring with your hands which if you're an avid toy user, might feel a bit foreign. Explore your body holistically rather than focusing all your attention on your vulva or penis. Pay attention to your body's response to each touch. What feels good, great, ticklish or maybe too intense or sensitive? Focus on what brings you pleasure, and next time explore that some more!

The bottom line

Mindful masturbation is incredible. Its beauty lies in the fact it turns your focus onto pleasure rather than reaching orgasm.

In short, there's no right or wrong way to masturbate, it's simply a journey of exploration and curiosity is the key. The purpose of mindful masturbation is to understand yourself better and in doing so, unlock new sensations and ways of experiencing pleasure. 

Using a toy is a great way to introduce novelty to your mindful masturbation and also gives you something to keep you present. Browse our range of sex toys for masturbation now.